Graham Clark Comedy Now smokers quit smoking joke
wannabo asked: What its like to be a smoker…The excitement! And quitting smoking and the Freudian puzzles that follow. Related articles by Zemanta Quit smoking once and for all (smokinghelper.com)
Smoking Riddle
Image by infomatique via Flickr Three people are in a lifeboat, adrift at sea. They have four cigarettes, but no matches or lighters. How can they each smoke a cigarette? Answer: throw one cigarette overboard, which will make the boat a cigarette lighter.
THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS in Legalese
Image by Robin Hutton via Flickr Whereas, on or about the night prior to Christmas, there did occur at a certain improved piece of real property (hereinafter “the House”) a general lack of stirring by all creatures therein, including, but not limited to, a mouse. A variety of foot apparel, e.g., stocking, socks, etc., had [...]
Will I Live to be a hundred?
Image by Templarion via Flickr A man asked his doctor if he thought he’d live to be a hundred. The doctor asked the man, “Do you smoke or drink?” “No,” he replied, “I’ve never done either.” “Do you gamble, drive fast cars, and fool around with women?” inquired the doctor. “No, I’ve never done any [...]
Don’t you think you’re a little young to be...
Image via Wikipedia Waiting at a bus stop one day a lady spots a young lad lighting up a cigarette. She turns to the boy and asks him: “Don’t you think you’re a little young to be smoking, how old are you?” “I’m 8 years old.” Answers the boy. “8? And how long have you [...]
My grandma lived to be a hundred and seven!
Image by remusse via Flickr A little boy was sitting smoking a cigarette on a park bench. After chain smoking three in a row, a man sitting on the bench across from him said, “Don’t you know smoking is bad for you? Your lungs get full of tar and your clothes will begin to smell [...]
It’s only smoking that keeps my wife alive!
Image by The Joy Of The Mundane via Flickr A young doctor was carrying out research into Coal Miners Pneumoconiosis (“Coal Dust Disease”), which gradually destroys the lungs. He was visiting the Miners Social Clubs, interviewing ex-miners who had the disease. In any research involving the lungs it is essential to know whether the person [...]
This Year Make a New Year’s Resolution that...
Image by Oberazzi via Flickr TALLAHASSEE, Fla., Dec. 16 /PRNewswire/ — This New Year’s, Tobacco Free Florida is urging Floridians to quit smoking and make the most important and impactful health decision of their lives. By offering free counseling and nicotine replacement therapies through the Florida Quitline, it is easier for Floridians to resolve to [...]
Smoking Stunts Your Growth…
Image by Vanessa Pike-Russell via Flickr A young couple had been married for a couple of weeks, and the man was always after his wife to quit smoking. One afternoon, she lit up after some lovemaking, and he said, “You really ought to quit.” She, getting tired of his nagging, said, “I really enjoy a [...]
Baby smoking
Image by cole24_ via Flickr The bus driver announces that smoking is prohibited on the bus and punishable by a fine of several hundred dollars. Suddenly at the back of the bus, a baby starts crying and bawling. “Come on kid,” the bus driver says “you’re only 6 months old, you can make it through [...]
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