Need Help To Quit Smoking While 28 Weeks Pregnant, Is...
I’m in the middle of a divorce. I found out my husband had an affair and he now lives with this woman and I’m pregnant with his child. I’m severely depressed, and have one or two episodes of histerical crying fits a day. I tried to quit smoking when I found out I was pregnant, but was unsuccessful. I feel guilty because I was more concerned about my husbands affair and his new life with another woman when I should have been concerned about the growing baby in my belly. I’ve felt so overwhelmed and alone during this pregnancy, and other than smoking and stress I have taken good care of my self. I suddenly have realized that what I’m doing is completely uncalled for and want to quit TODAY, but is it too late? Am I gonna blame myself for everything that goes wrong with my son now? Am I a bad person? I need tips on quiting and resources on quiting.
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5 Responses to “Need Help To Quit Smoking While 28 Weeks Pregnant, Is It Too Late?”
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August 27th, 2009 at 12:43 pm
your ob doc can give you information on quitting smoking. I think the best is to cut back more and more each day. I heard that the stress of cutting out somking completly is really bad for you and the baby. try cutting back to only 3 a day and then eventually none. the stress isnt good for you or your little one… take care
August 27th, 2009 at 1:08 pm
I completely understand where you are coming from, as far as blaming yourself for things that are wrong with your son. I was/am in the same boat. I smoked until I was 6 months pregnant. I tried to cut back and quit, but I never succeeded until I was 6 months along. IT IS NEVER TOO LATE!!!
The way you need to look at things is….you are smoking….that is the reality of it. You have tried to quit, which is th first step. *IF* (and a big if) you have created any problems from smoking while pregnant, the ‘damage’ is already done and there is nothign you can do about it…however, you can PREVENT anythign more from happening by quitting. There is no reason to feel guilt, or beat yourself up over this….just put forth ALL Of your efforts to quitting. You realize and understand that smoking isnt good for your baby or for you, and try to use that as motivation to quit. I know it is easier said than done. I used to beat myself up over the fact that “I am smoking and can not be strong enough to quit for my baby”…some people feel that when you find out you are pregnant, you shoudl automatically be able to easily not light up again, btu I am hear to tell you that even though I felt bad for smoking and knew I coudl potentially hurt my son, I couldnt quit easily. I struggled and struggled, and finally overcame it.
My mindset I put myself in to quit was this:
I need to be strong for my son. Whatever effects from me smoking he has, I will deal with and accept…and I will do everythgin I can to prevent further damage from me smoking by quitting. If I do *not* quit, once my son is born second hand smoke is a big factor in SIDS, and I wan to prevent that (for obvious reasons), so here is what a ‘typical’ session of going to have a cigarette will involve in order to prevent any smoke/chemicals gettign on him: Change clothes to your ‘smoking clothes’…go outside, smoke a cigarette, change back into your reg clothes OUTSIDE so that the smoking clothes do not track smoke inside, wash your hands, brush your teeth..ALL before you are safely able to pick up your son. Not an easy task to accomplish, especially if you have a crying hungry baby. If you plan on breastfeeding, you will also have to consider that as well, because some of thos toxins will pass to your breast milk.
I just thought of the inconviences of having a cigarette. I also kept reminding myself that I will not have TIME to smoke once my son was born…which turned out to be true…you will either be taking care of the baby, or takign care of the house or sleeping yourself.
I knwo it is hard, but trust in yourself that it CAN be done! I wasnt in your situation with your husband, but I *do* have an anxiety disorder as well as clinical depression that I have been dealing with for years.
I foudn comfort in cigarettes, and it was very hard for me to give up. I ended up quitting for the rest of my pregnancy and smoked for a little hwile after my son was born (traumatic thigns happened in my life that I just coudlnt deal with) and am currently quitting again. So I feel your pain.
One thing to rememebr….do NOT be too hard on yourslef if you happen to slip up and have one….ust know that every cigarette you do NOT smoke is one step better for your son. If you even cut only ONE cigarette out of your life, that is doing alot better than you are doing now. Ya know? Just stay strong.
My son was born with Ventricular Septum Defect (VSD) which is basically a hole in his heart. It might or might not heal on its own…or it may require surgery to fix it…we are unsure as of right now. They told me that it was NOT related to my smoking, however I can not help but question it and feel responsible for teh defect…I feel guilty everyday, but I try to stay positive and be tahnkful that there is SOME way to fix this hole in his heart.
Thast what you need to start doing. Think positive, and focus effort on doing good for your son and knowing that you are trying yor best for him.
Good luck and congrats!
A site you coudl check out is americanlungassociation.com
(it might be .org instead of .com…cant remember)
They have online support as well as a toll free number for free support 24/7!!!
If you ever want to chat, feel free to email me…I believe I am clickable.
August 27th, 2009 at 5:26 pm
Never to late to quit, the longer you smoke the more chances the child develops breathing problems or smoke related problems. A study by the University of Iowa found that smokers who quit cold turkey are more successful in giving up smoking. I would just stop it is hard but just pretend that you are on a desert island and can not get smokes.
August 27th, 2009 at 8:43 pm
Good for you. It is not easy to be where you are and just know it is NEVER TOO LATE. Being a good mother is not just something that happens, it takes work and it takes learning from mistakes. You are not a bad person, many people never quit, and never even feel guilty for it. Please talk to your doctor about this because they can help you. I am putting a link on here to a great website, it is the page about smoking. Try not to stress, while smoking is not good for baby, it is not too late. You can quit! There is some information about support on the bottom of the page.http://www.americanpregnancy.org/pregnan…
Good luck with eveything, I am sure you are going to have a beautiful little boy.
August 28th, 2009 at 3:35 am
Its never to late. Try not to worry about your dog of a Husband, he will figure out the grass isn’t always greener on the other side! not to say take him back either. 5% relationships sucseed when they were having a affair . Best of without him anyway just make sure you get child support. Get some gum when you feel like a smoke think of your baby and the smoke in your uterus ! that should help you quit alot quicker. good luck with everything.